Meet Lildonia Lawrence, local equality and diversity trainer

A new book by local equality and diversity trainer and wellbeing coach Lildonia Lawrence is set to open its healing pages to the city this month – helping to guide people through racial trauma recovery

Lildonia Lawrence is a wellbeing coach, equality and diversity trainer, yoga instructor and fitness professional with over a decade of experience in the field – having worked with the likes of the NHS, Arsenal Football Club, Amazon, Sky and King’s College London, among others. Her new book Back Yourself: A Wellbeing Guide to Healing from Racial Trauma will be released on 15 April by Trigger Publishing,
exploring crucial topics such as micro-aggressions, cultural identity, colourism and trans-generational trauma. We caught up with Lildonia to learn more about this book, her dedication to breaking down barriers – ensuring that marginalised communities have the tools and resources they need to thrive – and how she hopes Back Yourself will help readers across Bristol and beyond…

Has your coaching always a focus on supporting people from the global majority (formerly BAME), or did that develop over time?

It was a gradual shift. I naturally ended up helping people who fell outside the mainstream. My first job after university was at a hospice, followed by working with young people. I later worked primarily with LGBTQ+ communities, always supporting groups that faced discrimination or marginalisation. During the pandemic, I focused more on people from the global majority, especially after being asked to coach NHS workers and social workers. We received feedback that there wasn’t enough support for global majority staff, particularly those on the frontlines. I began working with this group and noticed recurring themes – imposter syndrome, micro-aggressions, and conflicts between home and work life. These issues resonated with me as a woman of colour, so I decided to create something to support people who were still going through these struggles. That’s when the idea for the book came about.

Did you notice gaps in how issues were being communicated within global majority communities and what did you want to change?

Yes, I saw that many people didn’t recognise when they were experiencing micro-aggressions. They’d sense something was wrong but would second-guess themselves, thinking, ‘Oh, they were just joking,’ or ‘It’s not a big deal because I get along with them.’ I wanted to change the way these issues were being discussed. I emphasised that if something feels wrong in your gut, trust that feeling – it’s probably valid. There’s a lot of fear around being seen as aggressive or ‘pulling the race card’, and people are often reluctant to speak out. Sometimes, even within our own communities, people are told, ‘It wasn’t that bad’, or ‘Just keep your head down’, which can make it harder to address these issues, especially in big institutions. I wanted to help people feel empowered to recognise and name what they’re experiencing.

How did you approach addressing such serious issues while harnessing that energy positive, empowering messaging for readers?

My goal was to leave people feeling empowered. I’ve attended conferences and workshops on race-related trauma, and often you leave feeling overwhelmed, like the world is hopeless. But many people from diverse backgrounds thrive despite societal challenges, and I wanted to reflect that in the book. I aimed to show readers that what they’re experiencing is real, and here’s why, but also provide tools to help them get through it. That’s why I chose the title Back Yourself – I wanted readers to know what they’re going through is real. I see you, I get you, but you can back yourself, and you can thrive.

How do you put advice from the book into practice in your own life?

It’s definitely a challenge. While I was writing the book, I experienced a difficult situation that wasn’t in the initial draft, but I added it just before the final edit. I was attacked racially by a group of 10 men in south Bristol while finishing the manuscript. I thought, ‘Wow, the universe is really testing me to live by the principles I’m writing about.’

So, I took the advice I give in the book and sought support. I reached out to organisations like Stand Against Racism & Inequality (SARI), who will be at my launch, as well as allies in my network. Many people think you can only turn to others with similar experiences, but I’ve found that allies can offer invaluable support – just talking things through, offering practical help like food shopping, or sending a Deliveroo.

I also had a group of peer reviewers and a WhatsApp group to stay connected with them. Personally, I leaned on my meditation, yoga, journalling, and affirmations – tools that I discuss in the book. But I had to use them more than ever during that time. There were moments when I questioned if it was all worth it, but I had to dig deeper, remind myself that it is worth it, and keep going.

Do you hope that the Bristol community will have a special connection to your book, considering its role on the global conversations around anti-racism work during 2020’s Black Lives Matter protests?

I do hope so. That’s why for the book’s launch I’ve made sure to involve Bristol-based organisations and artists to foster meaningful conversations. The event is open to people from the global majority and allies, and I really encourage allies to engage with each other. Being anti-racist is a collective journey, not something anyone can do alone.

I want people to connect with others who share similar values and have these important conversations. That’s also why I was so eager to keep the launch very Bristol-focused – I’m excited about what it can bring to the local community. This work can only be done in community. Without having these conversations, we can’t create real change.

For example, the people who assist me with my workshops and my PA are all white women. I’ve been asked if I only hire white women, but that’s not true. The reality is, I can’t do anti-racism work without the support of these peers and colleagues. Similarly, those who want to be anti-racist can’t do it without engaging with people from the global majority. Unfortunately, these conversations are often separate, especially in Bristol. The only way we can make lasting change is by coming together.

Can you share what your life aside from the book looks like right now?

My life is quite eclectic at the moment. I’m semi-retired from one-on-one coaching – I took a break from it to recharge. I still do well-being work, but now it’s mostly in groups or at conferences through keynotes and similar events. In September, I went back to university to pursue a doctorate in dance and social justice, combining my love of movement and social justice. I’m exploring embodied tools in this field.
A significant part of my work is training for anti-racism. I run a programme called Anti-Racism for Holistic Practitioners, where I hire a venue in Bristol a couple of times a year to offer open anti-racism training. This is for people whose organisations might not be providing it, so they can learn and connect with others on a similar journey of anti-oppression. I really enjoy this work and plan to offer another session in spring or early summer after my book launch.

What’s next for you in the coming months?

Moving forward, I’m focused on community building. I’ll be doing more anti-racism training because I believe this work needs to be done in community. I also have my podcast Intersections, which is currently in its fourth season. This season will focus on LGBTQIA+ experiences. So, more training, more community work, and more podcast episodes are on the horizon. And, of course, I’ll make sure to take time for rest and sleep, too!