Where in the world do you wish you could be right now? Now what if you were suddenly faced with the possibility of not leaving your home for some time – say, for example, you were living with ME (Myalgic Encephalomyelitis) or long-Covid? Your choice of destination might surprise you. Far-flung holiday locations could become less important, ushering into their place a certain tree, cherished city view or landmark nearby that you greatly miss.
More than 2 million people in the UK live with ME and Long Covid, including Bristol-based artist Alison Larkman, who lives with life-altering ME. Both neurological conditions share symptoms of extreme fatigue, pain, and cognitive difficulties, leaving many housebound for months or even years. Disconnected from lives they once led, prolonged isolation takes a huge toll. Unseen and unheard in daily life, their absence has made them invisible.
Alison’s work often explores themes of invisibility, fragility and the unseen. A former international rower, Alison studied at Chelsea College of Art, Newlyn Art School and Spike Island. In between those times, she has run businesses, worked with Hell’s Angels and retreated with ME.
It was that very experience – months being housebound due to an ME flare up and dreaming about where she would be if she could – that motivated Alison to create I Would Be Here If I Could, asking other people experiencing similar health issues where they would go if they were able to.
“I thought people would say holidays, but what was really interesting was that ordinary locations came up,” Alison recalls. “One person who uses a wheelchair just wanted to go to the park to see their children on the swing. It made me think, what if someone had just asked to go downstairs?”
Reflecting on this, Alison called out for submissions, gathering stories and locations from people to create a collection of places people wished they could be in.
I Would Be Here If I Could has taken the shape of the Mirrorbox – a large interactive sculpture, made in Bristol by Amalgam Modelmaking. Constructed from two-way mirrors, once you step inside and you will disappear from view, but can still see out, so you can listen to the message from the person who has chosen that place while you look out at the place they would be if they could.
“I love the fact that it sort-of interrupts someone’s day,” says Alison. “someone who might be out and about, and there’s suddenly this mirrored box, giving them a bit of a pause and time to think. Either way, they can just walk by, or come in and and find out what it’s all about.”
(Credit: Alison Larkman)
More than 100 recorded messages have been left for places across the UK from parks to beaches, opera houses to shopping centres for people to listen to via a headset inside the box (there’s also a transcription to read). Through stories and memories, these messages tell of special times and places that are important, amplifying the absence of so many people. “It’s become an archive of voices. And I think the recordings have become their own piece of art, in a way, and I think it’s really important that people can keep interacting with it.”
Visitors to the mirror box are invited to write a postcard back to the person who recorded the message and requested the location: “People can find a connection with someone through the love of a place. It’s not going to solve ME or long-Covid, but it’s giving people a voice, letting them tell a story.”
I Would Be Here If I Could’s unique nationwide journey will be starting from Bristol in June, connecting those now absent with those who stand at their place. From an oak tree in Ashton Court to the top of Glastonbury Tor, the Mirrorbox will stop at five well-loved locations in and near Bristol. Then over the next two years, the Mirrorbox will travel across the UK, its journey determined by the project’s participants, stopping only at locations where someone has left a message.
Alison explains that I Would Be Here If I Could is the largest collaborative art project in the UK co-curated with people living with M.E. and Long Covid – giving voice and presence to those who by their condition are so often absent from the everyday.
“This is social art at scale. A space for so many to express their creative voice and be heard beyond physical boundaries. We are a small team running a big project. More than 60% of the team are living with ME and long-Covid. We come from lived experience and as such a place of deep understanding.
“So many people living with chronic illness and disability have experience and great skills but cannot commit to traditional working patterns due to the fluctuating nature of their conditions. We are looking to challenge that.”
I Would Be Here If I Could has received funding from Arts Council England and The National Lottery Community Fund, but the project is actively looking for further support and partnerships to extend the Mirrorbox’s journey. “The whole project is about people,” Alison says. “It’s a living project, it will always be evolving into the piece of work it needs to be. I love the idea that it will keep popping up all over the place.”
For more information and confirmed dates of when and where the box will appear, plus to listen to all of the messages left for places across the UK on map, visit iwouldbehereificould.com.
Follow @iwouldbehereificould on Instagram and Facebook. You can find more about Alison’s artwork at alisonlarkman.com
